This body of mine 

knows and surrenders 

it remembers you

the even, bright memory of you. 

i want to sink into myself 

there is a river inside me 

the water is still 

and dark 

black. 

murky viscosity 

steaming saltiness that i must get past 

travel back from the sea and inlets

travel back past the stagnant beds

to rivulets 

up secret trails 

past water young and restless 

past rock and ice 

to where the river is a foetus

frozen 

black and dark 

this water inside me. 

waits

for me.